Sunday, January 1, 2012

Inebriated Holiday

I'm not including a picture of this one. You don't particularly want to see it.

I'd just left the low-key New Years party of a producer in Hell's Kitchen and was getting the subway to meet my girlfriend in the Lower East Side. It was about 2am, and the massive warehouse party she'd been bartending had let her go a little early. Their running out of both several kinds of liquor and even cups helped make that happen.

I have been many places for many celebrations. I don't know if I've ever seen so many drunk  people in one place. I don't mean happy drunk, I mean seriously impaired.

I reached Delancey street after passing three puddles of vomit and found a girl in what looked like a bikini and bunny ears working on number four. Number five came from a dude in the bar where I met Dana and our friends. Fifteen minutes later, he noticed my girlfriend, apparently liked what he saw, and started lurching in our direction. We moved. Quickly. He sat down and swayed at a table for a bit. We left the bar.

On the way out to some kind of food for Dana and our friend Ava (who happened to be celebrating her birthday that night), we saw about a block full of people cussing out a trio of dudes with sideways baseball hats blasting an air horn and dancing to it. A block earlier I'd spotted a taxi driving down the street with the door open and a lady sticking her head out of the open door and vomiting from inside the moving vehicle. A block before that we had passed a young woman crouched on a bicycle that was laying on its side. The young woman was crying and as I passed said to nobody in particular "I need some attention!"

Long before all this I had been chatting at my party about t-shirts. I (heart) NY ripoffs came up. Someone told me that he'd seen one with, instead of the heart, a picture of Eric Cartman from South Park pinching his nose and grimacing. I think that might have been inspired by a night like tonight.

So, Happy New Year, New York! I hope all of those crazies made it home safe.

1 comment:

  1. Yuck and ugh......and make it a double.